Dear Laura,
Today was not your best day, and I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry I let my irrational fears cloud your mind during what could, and should have been, a peaceful, healing time. And I'm sorry that I continued to let it hang over you all day, overshadowing everything else that happened. I'm sorry that I got so upset with you when you couldn't seem to find the motivation to get up and do the dishes like you've said you would the past three days; I should have been more understanding about what a toll my thoughts were having on you. I'm sorry that I dug around our memories to hedge out hurtful things from our past and go over them again, unnecessarily. I'm sorry that I let you think that one bad day meant you are a terrible person, or that you could never recover from it, that you are stuck in an endless vortex of dark, swirling emotions that you will never be free of: of not believing that miracles can and will happen to you, and for you, in your everyday life. I'm sorry for, even now, holding onto to old grudges and past pains, and letting them define who you are. And most of all, I'm sorry for letting you think, for even one second of your existence, that you are somehow not good enough; that you are found wanting, and are therefore undeserving of love, friendship, happiness, and a healthy lifestyle. I promise from now on to be more understanding of your thoughts and emotions, to know the difference between "I am not capable of dealing with this right now, I need to remove myself from this situation in order to calm down, clear my mind, and refocus so I can deal with this at a later time," and "I feel horrible, why can I not deal with this right now, this must mean I can't deal with anything, I'm a horrible person and I am justified in feeling every negative emotion ever and not dealing with life ever again." I promise to spend every day looking for and focusing on the good in life, on helping others, on fulfilling your passions, and letting you vegg out and watch Clueless now and then in your pj's, no judgment. I promise to believe the best about you, to be optimistic about your future and what it holds, and to believe in you when it seems impossible to go on. And most of all, I promise to love you, unconditionally and without fail.
You are worth it. Remember that every day, and we'll be just fine :)
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Out of our comfort zones speech
In every story, you have the exposition, the beginning
where you are introduced to the main character and their life, their family and
their friends. Then, something happens, a catalyst, if you will, a problem
needing to be resolved that leads to the rising action part of the story. This
takes up a good portion of the story, with the stakes rising higher and higher
until they reach the climax, the point of the most intensity and action for our
character, where they must act quickly in order to resolve everything. Usually,
our hero makes the right decision, and the immediate problem is resolved,
leading to the falling action, everything that happens after the climax, right
up to the resolution, where everything is sorted out, and our hero is left a
bit battered, but all the wiser and happier for it.
This is the outline for every story. And every time a
character goes through these steps, they are changed, whether it be for the
better, or for worse, they are no longer the same person they were when they
first started on their journey. The problem or problems they faced led them out
of their comfort zones, and into a deeper understanding of who they are, and what
they can accomplish , even in the worst of circumstances.
For many people, just hearing others stories is
enough. They go to a movie theatre, or read a book, and are entertained, maybe
they even think about it a bit, and then go right back to their regularly
scheduled lives. There are others, however, a select few, who are simply not
content to only hear of adventures and epic tales; they wish to have their own.
These are the people who recognize that every great story begins with a single
step. That step could be huge, like selling all of your worldly possessions to
go backpacking around the world, or it could be small, like taking a different
route to or from work one day and meeting someone new. These people understand
the concept that Neale Donald Walsch was trying to get at: Life begins at the
end of your comfort zone.
In the book The Alchemist, there is a young shepherd
boy who was convinced that he had found his role in life, his great destiny. He
had gone against his parents wish to become a priest to become a shepherd
instead and travel. But even then, he still had a recurring dream of a far off
place, and a treasure to be found. He ignored it as simply that, a dream, until
one day as he was sitting reading on a wall, an old man came and sat next to
him. He talked to the boy, introducing himself as a man called Melchizedek, the
king of Salem, and criticizing the book the young shepherd was reading. “It’s a
book that says the same thing almost all the other books in the world say. It
describes people’s inability to choose their own Personal Legends. And it ends
up saying that everyone believes the world’s greatest lie…that at a certain
point in our lives, we lose control of what is happening to us, and our lives
become controlled by fate. That is the world’s greatest lie.” He went on to
tell the boy that he was there because the boy had discovered his own personal
legend, and he was there to help him on his way. “Everyone, when they are young, knows what
their personal legend is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and
everything is possible…But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to
convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their Personal
Legend.”
We all have our own personal legends, our own wants
and desires in this life. While some may be truly impossible, like becoming a
cat or spontaneously sprouting wings and learning to fly, 99.9% of our dreams
are achievable. All it takes is one small step out of your comfort zone, to
step out into the world vulnerable and determined, and taking the chances as
they come. No one is stopping you from getting what you want except you. Every
day is a new choice; is this the day? Am I going to step out of my comfort zone
and let that step guide me somewhere new? It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said “Do
one thing a day that scares you.” And what scares us more as humans then
stretching ourselves out of our comfort zones?
I believe that everyone on this earth can achieve
their own personal legends, whether it be opening a bakery, or becoming a
world-traveling reporter, or finding their true love, buying that house
they’ve always wanted, achieving the perfect liquid line, or getting up the
courage to ask that one special person out, they can do it. YOU can do it. As a
wise king of Salem once said, “…when you want something, all the universe
conspires in helping you to achieve it.”
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
Celtic Party and Irish goodness
Last night, I had the absolute privilege of going to one of the best parties known to man, until the next one the host throws, that is. One of my friends, Kendra Clement, and her friend Diana (whose last name I never got, but who is an absolute joy) threw a Celtic themed party to celebrate the Summer solstice, and with it, new beginnings. They encouraged everyone to dress up as Irish peasants and to bring 5 dollars to donate and food to share. Having been to a couple of Kendra's parties before, I knew a little of what to expect. Music, food, encouragement of self-expression, laughter, and a story. And let me tell you, I wasn't disappointed. The food was excellent, everyone was dressed in varying versions of Irish peasants, as well as varying Irish accents (including my own, which sounds more Scottish than Irish, but hey, I tried). The house was decorated beautifully, with one room having twinkle lights, flowers, and a small tree, looking, for all intents and purposes, like an enchanted forest. Many were wearing crowns made with leaves, and it felt at times like being at the Renaissance Festival.
The evening started off with everyone sitting in a circle, listening to a few people play the drum, and encouraged to clap, sing, and/or dance as the mood struck us. We were all a little shy at first, but soon everyone was clapping along, and many were getting up to dance. They even brought out some ribbons for us to twirl around as we danced!
We then went into the Enchanted Forest room, which I was informed was really known as the Fairy Room, where we talked about the Summer Solstice and what it means, and new beginnings. We spoke of the importance of staying positive throughout all the changes in our lives, of being open to new experiences, and of realizing that every day is an opportunity to start anew. Three "fairies" then came flitting into the room, and gave the youngest person there (an adorable baby named Olivia) their blessings. She was blessed with color, courage, and the ability to make her life what she will. I needn't say how absolutely magical (see what I did there?) it was.
Dinner was next, a delightful buffet of shepherd's pie, 2 types of bread and dip, potato chips, cauldron cakes, watermelon, and all other sorts of deliciousness. I was worried at first that there might not be enough for everyone there, but we actually had leftovers! Everyone really stepped up their food game :)
Kendra and Diana had asked 4 people to give speeches on varying topics during dinner, and I'm very humbled to say that I was one of the lucky few. One lovely lass sang a song of her own creation on love, another used ballroom dancing as a metaphor for unity, and another encouraged us to think back to the last time we laughed so hard our stomachs hurt, and to look for the joy in life everyday. I was honored to give a speech on new beginnings and becoming the hero of your own story, which speech I will publish in a different post if you would like to read it.
Now, not to alarm anyone, but we did have a bit of a skirmish occur. Right after dinner, one of the men came running in, shouting about a band of men with masks and swords coming right towards us! The menfolk, as is only right, went off to gather their weapons and prepare to defend us, while the ladyfolk went into the front room to sing and console each other about the upcoming battle. But lo! Two masked men with swords appeared partway through our songs, and whisked away two of our ladies! Horrified, we called our menfolk, and we all marched off to battle to the beat of the drums to reclaim our stolen kin. We found them, tied up and with a sword to their throats, on top of a rock overlooking a pool of water. Bravely, our men snuck up behind the masked villains and began a battle to save our women! We all shouted and played our drums till the battle was o'er, and the masked men had fallen to their fate in the water. Unmasking them, we discovered that the masked men were no strangers to us, but were in fact our town historian and local drunkard! They quickly explained that they had become fearful that, in this time of peace in our land, heroes were no more, and had conducted this experiment to see if any would step up to the role of mighty heroes! Humbled, they asked for the ladies forgiveness, which was given on condition that the story be recorded as a lesson to be taught to future generations, and we all Huzza'd! and went on our merry way back to the festivities.
The rest of the evening was spent learning a reel, as well as a game closely resembling Duck Duck Goose, but for adults. We also had the pleasure of having a lady present who knew how to Irish dance, and taught us a basic dance. And might I just say, Irish dancing is not as easy as it looks.
After all that merriment, we had a sobering announcement. We learned what our money donations for the evening were really for. The money was being donated to help build homes for families in Nigeria, and not only that, but the families are given chickens, and sewing machines along with sewing lessons, to start them off in their new lives. It was a very touching and humbling moment, as we all looked around at the beautiful home we were in, with its carpet and air conditioning and sturdy walls.
The night then concluded with many a musical number from the guests. We enjoyed hearing about two cat salesmen and their woes, as well as their triumph at adopting a new cat. There was a Shakespeare ballad from Twelfth Night, original songs on the piano and guitar, covers of songs, arrangements, sing-alongs, and much enjoyment, The talent that was gathered together that night was unspeakably beautiful and unique, everyone displaying not only the wonderful talents blessed to them, but also the unique and personal way they used them. Not one act sounded like another, yet they were all equally wonderful and enjoyable, and I truly loved hearing and seeing everyone using their talents. I can never thank Kendra and Diana enough for that precious gift.
All in all, it was one of the best spent evenings of my life, and I am beyond grateful that I was invited to such a lovely event, and that everyone there was kind and willing to be open and vulnerable and silly together, even though many of us were meeting that night for the first time. If you are ever invited to a strange-seeming party by someone with the surname of Clement, I suggest you go. And I suggest you open your heart to all the wonderful experiences and people you will find there. You don't have to dress up or be musically talented in any way to enjoy it; you just have to be there, and be open to new experiences. I had a truly wonderful time, despite my offending about 5 different countries at once with my attempt at an Irish accent, and learned so much about myself and about how I believe the world should be. This is my prayer for all of you; that you are kind, that you know you are blessed with so much more than you can even comprehend right now, that you are loved, and that you are capable of anything and everything you set your heart and mind to. All it takes is one step. May the best day of your past, be the worst day of your future.
--Laura
P.S. I'll be posting the speech I gave at the party in another post, so keep an eye out for it if you'd like to give it a read!
The evening started off with everyone sitting in a circle, listening to a few people play the drum, and encouraged to clap, sing, and/or dance as the mood struck us. We were all a little shy at first, but soon everyone was clapping along, and many were getting up to dance. They even brought out some ribbons for us to twirl around as we danced!
We then went into the Enchanted Forest room, which I was informed was really known as the Fairy Room, where we talked about the Summer Solstice and what it means, and new beginnings. We spoke of the importance of staying positive throughout all the changes in our lives, of being open to new experiences, and of realizing that every day is an opportunity to start anew. Three "fairies" then came flitting into the room, and gave the youngest person there (an adorable baby named Olivia) their blessings. She was blessed with color, courage, and the ability to make her life what she will. I needn't say how absolutely magical (see what I did there?) it was.
Dinner was next, a delightful buffet of shepherd's pie, 2 types of bread and dip, potato chips, cauldron cakes, watermelon, and all other sorts of deliciousness. I was worried at first that there might not be enough for everyone there, but we actually had leftovers! Everyone really stepped up their food game :)
Kendra and Diana had asked 4 people to give speeches on varying topics during dinner, and I'm very humbled to say that I was one of the lucky few. One lovely lass sang a song of her own creation on love, another used ballroom dancing as a metaphor for unity, and another encouraged us to think back to the last time we laughed so hard our stomachs hurt, and to look for the joy in life everyday. I was honored to give a speech on new beginnings and becoming the hero of your own story, which speech I will publish in a different post if you would like to read it.
Now, not to alarm anyone, but we did have a bit of a skirmish occur. Right after dinner, one of the men came running in, shouting about a band of men with masks and swords coming right towards us! The menfolk, as is only right, went off to gather their weapons and prepare to defend us, while the ladyfolk went into the front room to sing and console each other about the upcoming battle. But lo! Two masked men with swords appeared partway through our songs, and whisked away two of our ladies! Horrified, we called our menfolk, and we all marched off to battle to the beat of the drums to reclaim our stolen kin. We found them, tied up and with a sword to their throats, on top of a rock overlooking a pool of water. Bravely, our men snuck up behind the masked villains and began a battle to save our women! We all shouted and played our drums till the battle was o'er, and the masked men had fallen to their fate in the water. Unmasking them, we discovered that the masked men were no strangers to us, but were in fact our town historian and local drunkard! They quickly explained that they had become fearful that, in this time of peace in our land, heroes were no more, and had conducted this experiment to see if any would step up to the role of mighty heroes! Humbled, they asked for the ladies forgiveness, which was given on condition that the story be recorded as a lesson to be taught to future generations, and we all Huzza'd! and went on our merry way back to the festivities.
The rest of the evening was spent learning a reel, as well as a game closely resembling Duck Duck Goose, but for adults. We also had the pleasure of having a lady present who knew how to Irish dance, and taught us a basic dance. And might I just say, Irish dancing is not as easy as it looks.
After all that merriment, we had a sobering announcement. We learned what our money donations for the evening were really for. The money was being donated to help build homes for families in Nigeria, and not only that, but the families are given chickens, and sewing machines along with sewing lessons, to start them off in their new lives. It was a very touching and humbling moment, as we all looked around at the beautiful home we were in, with its carpet and air conditioning and sturdy walls.
The night then concluded with many a musical number from the guests. We enjoyed hearing about two cat salesmen and their woes, as well as their triumph at adopting a new cat. There was a Shakespeare ballad from Twelfth Night, original songs on the piano and guitar, covers of songs, arrangements, sing-alongs, and much enjoyment, The talent that was gathered together that night was unspeakably beautiful and unique, everyone displaying not only the wonderful talents blessed to them, but also the unique and personal way they used them. Not one act sounded like another, yet they were all equally wonderful and enjoyable, and I truly loved hearing and seeing everyone using their talents. I can never thank Kendra and Diana enough for that precious gift.
All in all, it was one of the best spent evenings of my life, and I am beyond grateful that I was invited to such a lovely event, and that everyone there was kind and willing to be open and vulnerable and silly together, even though many of us were meeting that night for the first time. If you are ever invited to a strange-seeming party by someone with the surname of Clement, I suggest you go. And I suggest you open your heart to all the wonderful experiences and people you will find there. You don't have to dress up or be musically talented in any way to enjoy it; you just have to be there, and be open to new experiences. I had a truly wonderful time, despite my offending about 5 different countries at once with my attempt at an Irish accent, and learned so much about myself and about how I believe the world should be. This is my prayer for all of you; that you are kind, that you know you are blessed with so much more than you can even comprehend right now, that you are loved, and that you are capable of anything and everything you set your heart and mind to. All it takes is one step. May the best day of your past, be the worst day of your future.
--Laura
P.S. I'll be posting the speech I gave at the party in another post, so keep an eye out for it if you'd like to give it a read!
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